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Quick Poll

kess

You’re 300,468 from the money in the combined superfinal tournament championship satellite put on by WSOPGG88CHATGPISKYNET, you have AK in the BB facing a jam with three blinds left.

Losers are gravitationally compressed to a string of information in the form of non-binary characters and inserted into a strand of the Phil Hellmuth Foreverbot’s ear hair where they listen* and vibrate whenever he praises himself; at that moment the single-molecule crystalline straightens and illuminates as your consciousness comes back on-line for the duration of the praise.

Do you fold or call?

You have 15 seconds to act, and thank you for choosing WSOPGG88CHATGPISKYNET for all your subconscious and REM tournament needs.

*You may or may not also hear a high pitched, 194 decibel but otherwise pleasant tone, which may or may not be coming from the string of your characters as their atomic components slow near absolute zero while also colliding and recombining in previously unpredicted formations; models are not entirely conclusive and test subjects continuously fail to report.

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